Charles Apple

So when I left you last – nearly 24 hours ago — I was preparing to board a huge South African Airways jet bound for Washington’s Dulles airport.

Although we had already passed through security, we passengers were pushed through yet another checkpoint at the gate. This is because U.S. requirements are so much tighter than those of other countries, we were told.

Problem is, it’s a big plane. With lots of passengers. And there aren’t nearly enough guards to make this an efficient process. So the line grows to enormous proportions.

Somehow, I actually got pulled aside for a patdown and a carry-on spotcheck. I enjoyed the patdown — hell, some people pay good money for stuff like this. But when the guard opened my carry-on bag, he took one look at the crap I had tossed in there, rolled his eyes and zipped it back up. So much for security.

This was the front of my plane:

About where the A straddles the windows — that’s where I was sitting.

And, yes, the aircraft had wings and engines, too:

Once again, my clients sprang for a business class seat. Man, these things are comfortable. And that comfort multiplied when no one showed up to take the seat next to me.

A row to myself!WooHOO!

As you can see there, the first thing I do is pull off my shoes and change into my travel slippers. They might look goofy, but they’re very comfy.

Our flight was delayed another half-hour, though, when two passengers didn’t board. Their luggage had been checked and loaded, the captain explained. So they had to go into the hold, track down the bags and remove them from the plane.

Once we got off the ground, the entire country of South Africa got together and offered me a wonderfully generous going-away present: The most incredible sunset.

My nice Canon Digital Rebel was packed away, so I had to shoot these with my “backup” camera, Sharon’s Kodak EasyShare. Take my word for it, the actual colors were much more vivid than this.

I had been telling everyone I had a 16-hour flight from Johannesburg to D.C. but I was mistaken — it was more like 19 hours, including an hour on the ground in Dakar to refuel and to change crews.

I read an entire book — Born Standing Up, an autobiography of comedian Steve Martin. Plus, I watched two movies: G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (which sucked) and Land of the Lost (which sucked slightly less, but only slightly).

And I got some sleep. A lot of sleep, actually. Which was fabulous.

We arrived in D.C. 20 minutes early. Going through passport control was much easier this time than it had been in September, mostly because of the new luggage Sharon bought me.

Richard Curtis — who retired from USA Today a year ago this month — met me at the airport for breakfast.

It was great to see him again. He was the last guy I saw when I left, too. I’m very lucky that Richard bookended my trip for me.

I’m writing from gate A1, surely the grungiest of all the gates here in Dulles.

At least it’s not crowded this time.

And normally, it’s quite warm in here. It’s rather chilly at the moment. Probably because it’s December and I’m wearing short sleeves. I only brought one jacket — a sport coat — and it’s in my checked bags. Which, at this very moment, are either being loaded on my plane or on a plane for Timbuktu. Even money on which.

I’ll be in Norfolk by 1:20. And man, am I looking forward to seeing Sharon and Elizabeth.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 1st, 2009 at 11:24 am and is filed under Travelogue, Trip to South Africa. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.