Charles Apple

So here’s what happened…

1. The jokers (sorry) at DC Comics decided to give Wonder Woman a new costume.

2. Kelly Cutrone — a fashion consultant — comments on the news look thusly:

She’s gone from Paris to Poughkeepsie. I just think it’s the saddest thing I’ve ever seen in my whole life.

3. Well, what do you think happened? The Poughkeepsie Journal — circulation 29,767 — just had to put something about it out on A1 today:

I know what you’re thinking. Yeah, that’s the new Wonder Woman costume. Very 1990s, ain’t it?

Here’s a closer look at the centerpiece:

When questioned about it, Cutrone told Journal staffer John W. Barry she wasn’t trying to dis the city. She was referring to the local mall — the Poughkeepsie Galleria, where Cutrone apparently shops:

“Her look is ’shopping mall,’ ” Cutrone said of Wonder Woman’s makeover. “It’s like any shopping mall, but my mall is the Poughkeepsie mall. Wonder Woman looks like any girl in a mall — anywhere.”

Naturally, Barry then contacted the marketing director for the Galleria for further comment:

We are what our shoppers are. I think they are great and they are tastefully dressed.

You can laugh at this story if you like. But I’d argue it’s better than reading about LeBron effin’ James for three weeks.

Find the Poughkeepsie Journal’s Wonder Woman story here.

Read more here about the costume change itself.

Not surprisingly, Fox News bemoans the costume change as unpatriotic. Never mind the fact that the fictional Diana Prince wasn’t American to begin with: She’s an Amazon from Paradise Island. Read that story here.

Now that the Poynter ‘tablet conference’ is over, here’s the real scoop on the Apple iPad from a source you can trust: Mad magazine.

The cover to the new issue:

Ouch! But funny.

The story on the inside is by John Caldwell, whose work used to impress me back in the 1980s, when he cartooned for National Lampoon. Click for a larger view:

That’s the only page Mad previewed for us on its web site. My pal Darren Sanefski says his copy just arrived in the mail, so look for it soon at your nearest newstand or trash heap.

In other news, Darren Sanefski subscribes to Mad magazine. Rumor has it that he looks forward to the annual swimsuit edition in February.

Find Mad’s home on the web here. Better yet, find Mad uber-artist Tim Richmond’s cartooning blog here.

Famed comic book artist Chris Ware was commissioned this spring to illustrate the cover to Fortune magazine’s May issue.

A blogger who attended Ware’s presentation at the Chicago Comic and Entertainment Expo last weekend writes:

He also showed a cover he did for Fortune magazine which was supposed to be on the Fortune 500 issue. He accepted the job because it would be like doing the 1929 issue of the magazine, and he filled the image with tons of satirical imagery, like the U.S. Treasuring being raided by Wall Street, China dumping money into the ocean, homes being flooded, homes being foreclosed, and CEOs dancing a jig while society devolves into chaos. The cover , needless to say, was rejected.

Here’s the cover (click for a much larger view):

One can see right away why the piece was rejected. Can you imagine the cry of anguish from readers of Fortune had this published? Hell, can you imagine the cry of anguish from the editors of Fortune when they saw the finished piece?

Did someone approve a rough sketch or idea by Ware before the piece was pushed this far?

To a subversive mind, of course, the piece is — as they say — full of win.

I’ll point out a few details…

Helicopters scoop money out of the U.S. Treasury Dept. Note the empty Greek treasury building in the distance.

The helicopters then dump the cash on top of the skyscrapers where, presumably, business executives rejoice in the rain of dollars.

The merriment is aided by a nice wet bar. Note more dancing execs on the building at left. I wonder of Ware is aware (heh) that the dancing motions he draws look a lot like a Wifi icon.

On the west coast, you see Hollywood filmmakers shooting scenes of death and violence. Behind them, you see the Chinese exporting goods to the U.S. and, sure enough, throwing their surplus dollars into the ocean.

To the south, Mexican citizens work in a sweatshop, carefully fenced off from the U.S. with barbed wire and armed guards.

And in Cuba, orange jumpsuit-clad political prisoners sit bound and blindfolded.

Throughout the country, things are falling apart. Farms are turned into housing developments that no one wants.

Falling property values are addressed…

…as are the loss of retirement funds. Note that Ware misspelled “cemetery.”

Domestic oil is in shambles.

The goods shipped from China are hauled into giant “big box” retail stores.

Wall Street has apparently relocated to Vegas.

The Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation bails out the bank but leaves homes and homeowners underwater.

In the cities, folks are shot in the streets while others stuff themselves with fast food and trade bad credit as if it were used golf shoes.

I’m not sure about the reference to “Greenspan Lube Pro.” I mean, I get it, I think. I just don’t want to know if my guess is correct.

Meanwhile, tea partiers do their thing. I don’t know which I find more amusing: the elephant-shaped tea kettle or the red-dressed speaker atop the kettle.

And, in the Rockies, extremist armageddon-types camp out with their guns and provisions.

See MediaBistro’s take on the cover here. The Chicagoist sounds off here. Find Gawker’s story here.

Earlier this year, Ware illustrated a cover for the New Yorker:

Find a bibliography of Chris Ware’s comic book work here. Find an archive of all his work here.

Book designer and illustrator Chip Kidd interviewed Chris for Print magazine. Find that Q&A here.

Thanks to Nicole Bogdas for the tip.